Were any of us really ready for motherhood? Honestly, is there ever enough money? Is there a moment when it’s the perfect time to have a child? I don’t think so. Having a baby is a big deal. It is scary and quite frankly, not for everyone. If we all waited until we we were ready to have a child, the human race would die out.
Many women today are considering freezing their eggs to extend the baby-making years. In theory, this sounds like a great idea. At least, I did. I would have happily considered freezing my eggs just to have been more stable in my life, in our careers, where we lived.
When we had our first daughter, we were still trying to figure things out as a couple and that was after five years of marriage. I could have waited another five and life would have been a lot easier. I would have been wiser, but then I would have been 36 when I had my first child and then 38 when I had my second and that just seemed “old” to me then (like it does to most young women before they actually hit their late 30’s.)
The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologist has now issued a statement warning healthy women not to use egg freezing to pause their biological clocks because it gives a false sense of security. Just because you save your eggs does not guarantee a healthy pregnancy.
The recommendation for egg freezing is only for women who are facing cancer or other medical treatments that can cause infertility. Not enough research has been done to determine if the process is safe, ethical and cost effective. The ironic part is that the warning comes when egg freezing is becoming commonplace.
I am 41 years old, and I would love to have another baby. I’ve had two healthy, successful natural pregnancies that resulted in my daughters and I had one pregnancy that ended in a miscarriage when I was 39. The doctor assures me that there was nothing wrong with the baby, but rather it was in direct correlation to the stress I was under at the time. If I had a healthy egg extracted, I might try for another pregnancy …
But I’d hate to think that there are women who are putting off pregnancy, for whatever reason, and placing all their faith in the fact that they have reserved and extracted their healthy eggs only to find out that they can’t carry the baby to term or outside circumstances cause a hostile environment in the womb. This could result in a lot of women losing out on their one and only chance at motherhood. It’s a great back-up plan, but maybe not the best plan for motherhood.
Would you freeze your eggs so you could have a baby when you might be more ready?